Title: The Diamond Head Deception
Author: James Blakley
Genre: Mystery, Thriller
Publication Date: October 12, 2015
Publisher: Inkwater Press
Pages: 216
This product was given to Black Fox Book Review in exchange for an honest review.
My Star Rating: 1 out of 5
Amazon Book Blurb:
Trouble in Paradise - After putting Iowa crop insurance cheats out to pasture independent insurance fraud investigator Luna Nightcrow heads to Hawaii, but not for a vacation. The Shilpa, an Indian ocean liner, sinks and Luna is hired to determine if it still carries "Pacific Splendor" (a rare diamond insured for $15 million). The trouble is that Luna's not the only one looking for the diamond. Secessionists, sportsmen, and other suspects might sink to any depths to recover or smother Pacific Splendor. Action, mystery, and romance abound as Luna dares to look around.
Review:
The third self-published novel by author Blakley, The Diamond Head Deception has a plot that at first glance seemed intriguing. However, I quickly regretted my decision to read this book. Before the first chapter was over, I had a running list of reasons why I wouldn't enjoy finishing the story. Let's itemize them, shall we?
First off, too many nicknames were introduced right off the bat. We are already trying to keep characters straight (which bad guys are into what kind of schemes, which good guys work for which organization, etc). Then we meet Barnabas "Barney" Aikers and Charlene "Charly" Barns (Alias Clover Fields). It was a bit much to take in all at once.
Secondly, the point of view was all over the map. Classic rookie writing faux pas. The reader thinks he's experiencing the story from Luna's point of view, third person limited. However, we are treated to some of Barney's internal dialog, which seemed to be the only way the author could figure to quickly reveal the perpetrators' plot: "Barney asked himself, Was paying crop inspector Clyde Tiller to fake damage to my crops worth this?! And me, selling the real production under a fake name!" I won't even comment on the awkwardness of those sentences. Whoops... I guess I did comment.
My third gripe, which applies throughout the novel, is my skepticism at the role that Luna, the insurance investigator, plays. As far as I know, insurance investigators conduct background research, monitor online and social media activity, and may take video or photo surveillance. In Blakley's novel however, Luna carries a concealed weapon, chases bad guys, and runs over concession stands with a "6R Series John Deere" tractor. And that's all in the first chapter.
The remainder of the novel was riddled with editing errors, superfluous commas, and awkward sentences (e.g.: "The sky was blue, and so was Nani's mood becoming (though it was to be a darker shade).") There was also an odd propensity toward naming specific models of technology. I always knew exactly what model of smartphone the characters were using. Maybe the author was trying to lend credibility, but it was too distracting. Finally, the romance mentioned in the blurb was virtually nonexistent, and I felt that Blakley's portrayal of Luna's feminine feelings was at times a bit chauvinistic.
I did appreciate the fast-moving plot, but the action scenes were sometimes choppy and confusing. I liked that the ending wasn't entirely predictable. However, and won't come as much of a surprise, I cannot recommend this book.
